Chidanand Rajghatta has a great article about the dark side of desis, which is kind of a raison d’etre for a Maccaca Crimewatch column. While reading it, I could not help but think that we desis tend to reinforce only positive stereotypes. How many times have I heard “Oh, we ( desis) don’t do things like that ” – that being premarital sex, adultery, crime etc etc. Negative stereotypes however, immediately make us defensive – I can attest to that personally. I hate it and spring to the defence whenever anyone – especially non desi - references a stereotype that makes me uncomfortable.
Desi family kills black daughter-in-law
One of the cases mentioned in Rajghatta’s article is that of Chiman Rai, a desi ex-professor,who was recently denied bail. His crime? This heartless specimen of humanity (!) sent contract killers to kill his bahu because she was black! He paid four men the sum of $ 10,000 to stab and kill his 22-year old daughter-in-law Sparkle Rai. Sparkle was married to his son Rick Rai and mother of baby Alana, who was 7 months old and in the apartment when her mother was murdered. Rick Rai is also being investigated. Apparently, he never told Sparkle about his parents and once told her they were dead. After her death, he remarried a woman of Indian descent and never told this wife about either Sparkle or Alana!
I ask Über Desi readers to count the number of desi stereotypes that appear in the story- the stereotypes that make us uncomfortable, but sadly, in this case are true:
- Chiman Rai was once a Professor of Math – note the science/math background which, unfortunately did not translate to modern thinking
- He switched careers to buy a supermarket/convenience store. Enough said!
- He hated his bahu because she was black and not Indian – desi racism is alive and kicking.
- He believed that he had a right to decide how his grown son lived his life, to the extent of mudering his son’s wife!
- Rick Rai did not have the spine to introduce his parents to Sparkle or Sparkle’s parents
- Following the murder, Rick Rai chose to move on and not even mention Sparkle or Alana – presumably he has nothing to do with his daughter now.
When a girl gets married in India, tradition dictates that she is welcomed to the in-laws house as an incarnation of Lakshmi, the goddess of wealth. The extended family, friends and neighbors greet her and shower her with gifts and blessings. My heart bleeds for Sparkle Rai – she received none of these. Instead, she had to face the brunt of outdated desi thinking and paid for it with her life. When will we change?
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